Looking a little tired but I’m ready to go out for a few hours. @cutiespoonies
Good(?) morning
Firstly, sorry for the negative ranting last night. It was something that has been bugging me for a while and I just needed to get it off my chest
Secondly, I didn’t get much sleep last night so I’m still feeling pretty lousy. My cough has returned with a vengeance, so it’s stopping me from sleeping now. I’m still wanting to go out today but I might not do as much as I originally planned. Still, you never know; after some tea, I might feel a bit more lively. The weather is looking dry at least, and my stomach isn’t feeling as bad as it was last night. I’m going to try and eat some gluten-free cereal with almond milk for breakfast and hope it doesn’t hurt. Besides, it’s almost time for my afternoon meds.
Night time thoughts and stomach cramps
I’ve just been woken up by some idiot revving his motorbike at one in the morning and now, what with my stomach making all manner of noises and cramping, I can’t get back to sleep. So my sleep-deprived mind is wandering into that dark corner where all my depressed thoughts lurk.
I mean, I’ve tried to remain positive this week, especially at work because I’m customer facing and no one will buy from a depressed sales assistant. So I’ve smiled and done what I can, even though I’m in pain and feeling pretty crap but it’s when it gets quiet and I’m talking with my colleagues, and one well-meaning guy says that’s he thinks it’s “a lot to do with state of mind”, like I should think more positively and accept my situation for what it is. And my only thoughts are well, ok, but it’s not that simple. I know what’s happening to me far better than anyone else, and I’ve come to terms with the chronicness of my disease, but it doesn’t mean I have to like my situation.
My UC has gone from “mild” to “severe” in three months. I’ve been in hospital twice in those three months as a direct result of my UC, and am now on too many different medications daily to count. No one at my work has any idea what that is like. They may know people who have Crohn’s which has “gotten better”, but that’s not me. Until you have been diagnosed with a chronic disease, you have no right to advise someone who is already suffering. Until then, people should keep their comments to themselves. I do not have to be ok with my situation!
Just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there #invisibleillness #chronicillness #autoimmune #livewell #bekind #arthritis #fibromyalgia #scoliosis #lupus #crohns #uc #migraines #ms #mediswarm #spoonie #sick
Finally the weekend
Today couldn’t have ended sooner. I’m so exhausted from working today, all I wanted to do when I go home was sleep but I have stayed up because I really needed to eat something. I’ve been terrible this evening and had Chinese take away (plain noodles with sweet and sour chicken). Already feeling the bloat so I’ve left half the noodles, but it’s filled me up and given me a little more energy to stay up a bit later.
The cold appears to be getting slightly better; the cough is less frequent and I can breathe a bit easier. My eyes have really benefited from a day off from contact lenses so I’m keeping them out until the morning. My head isn’t hurting anymore and my throat is a bit better. I haven’t had a Lemsip yet but I’ll do that before bed along with some cough syrup.
The plan tomorrow is to get some more beads (I couldn’t find any in my local craft shop the other day), do a little autumn clothes shopping ready for my trip to Lincoln in October, and then a relaxing afternoon of making Halloween/Autumn bracelets and charms. I’m feeling quite creative recently, which is great because I haven’t done anything creative (drawn, painted, written) in literally years. I find it quite relaxing; it’s a good distraction from my current situation and, if I feel they are any good, I may even put a few up on Etsy. I’ll update about that as and when it happens.
Anyway, sorry for the long post. Have a good night everyone.
Still feel pretty lousy. The cough is persistent, the throat is soar and the sinuses hurt too. I’ve taken more Lemsip and cough syrup with lunch but it’s not doing much. I might get some tea later; I’ve been having double shots of caramel syrup with my tea, instead of sugar, which seems to make me feel a little better, if only for a short time. I just want today to finish so I can go home to bed. I need sleep more than anything but it’s hard when you work full time and are up early every morning. Only five more hours to go. Let’s hope they go fast.
It’s Saturday
I didn’t get to sleep as early as I would have liked last night, but I was in bed by nine, at least. I think I slept ok once I did get to sleep but it was broken; the cough seems to have now developed into a barking one which seems to explode out of me in short bursts. Still, I’m feeling better this morning than I was yesterday morning.
I’m wearing my glasses to work today instead of my contract lenses to give my eyes a rest.
I was a bit negative yesterday so I’m trying for positive vibes today. Just keep smiling.
Not IBD-related, but I just made a little charm for my work keys. I used red and black cords with bronze clip and circlets. The beads are from the ones I ordered last week to make my spoonie bracelets with.
I’m so glad today is over
The cold has only gotten worse and the doctor said the antibiotics I’m on won’t do anything for it. I’ve got a slowly growing headache and my throat and stomach muscles are soar from all the coughing I’ve been doing today.
I really don’t feel like eating but I will have some soup at least before I go to bed. My parents brought over some homemade apple and banana crumble so I might have a bit of that too.
I still have to work tomorrow but then I’m off for two days so I can sleep in on Sunday. My next infliximab infusion is this Monday morning so I’ll be up early but I can always go back to bed once I get home from it.
I’m finding it hard to stay positive again but I’ll do my best to keep smiling tomorrow. I’m tired of feeling like I’m letting people down.
What Can I Eat 