pb8:

it really bothers me that so many people on this site treat ableism like it’s black and white.

just now i saw a post where op was like “i’m glad that spinners are popular because it normalizes fidgets and decreases stigma” and someone replied like “no!! it’s absolutely TERRIBLE that neurotypicals are using these fidgets because when they get in trouble they make things harder for mentally ill kids!!” and like you guys do realize that? you’re both right? it isn’t a decisive fact that neurotypicals using fidgets is either good or bad, there are both benefits and consequences that need to be taken into consideration.

a few months ago there was a post going around that was like, *neurotypical voice* why are you bouncing your leg, and somebody reblogged it saying that the post was ableist because autistic kids can get overstimulated by leg bouncing. i go to a school for the mentally disabled, and i’ve been in this exact scenario, my classmate wasn’t able to focus because i was bouncing my leg and although i felt bad i told him that i wouldn’t be able to stop for long because i do it subconsciously due to my adhd. he wasn’t being ableist for asking me to stop, and i wasn’t being ableist for saying i couldn’t, we just both had different needs. in the end, our compromise was that i went to work in the computer lab.

you have to understand that there is always more than one side to issues like these, and that we should be striving for understanding and balance over demonization of one side and blind support of the other. this is especially relevant when people on both sides are mentally ill or disabled, because sometimes symptoms will clash and you just need to deal with it.

I’m probably what people would call “neurotypical”, meaning, I don’t have a diagnosis

nor do I exhibit symptoms of any mental illness (aside from de-realisation). However, I find my fidget cube very helpful when in stressful situations. For example, when I went down to the theatre for my surgery last month, I took my cube with me (even though I was told to leave everything in my room) and found that focusing on the spinner with my thumb was enough to keep me from thinking about what was going to happen. It also gave the nurses something to talk to me about whilst en route to the theatre instead of soul-crushing silence.

Things they don’t tell you about being a first time wheelchair user in highschool

angelkin-autie:

Literally everyone will ask if you broke your leg(s). Everyone. Even people you don’t know. Theyll ask a lot and think you’re extremely fragile.

bruises show up within the first day of rolling around, and they can really suck

people will try to grab your chair if they think you’re struggling and it can be hard not to snap at them for it

static electricity is a huge issue. You will probably either continuously shock your leg when you’re rolling around or do what I did today and zap someone so hard as you pass that both of you nearly keel over

people will call you out as a faker if you do anything even remotely fun ever on your wheelchair. Wheelies? Obviously your legs are fine lol not like you have to go down fucking curbs /s

puddles are the worst and if there’s a curb with a puddle all around and you have some ability to walk its a better idea to just stand up and navigate the chair than to fall backwards into said puddle

weird looks from people are inevitable, especially from people who don’t like you

bus drivers will often push your chair and give you advise you don’t want to hear, even if you tell them nicely you can push yourself. Its really hard not to get mad at them for it

no wheelies in school. Though if you do it in the elevator when no one else is with you you can’t really get caught.

speaking of wheelies, always be ready to throw at least one arm behind you in case you fall. They say tuck your chin in but its easier and more reliable to throw your hands back and keep your neck up so you don’t hit the floor. Sore arms are way easier to put up with than head injuries

don’t even bother to try and roll back up curbs. You will either be there for an hour or fall backwards. I managed to do both.

90% of classrooms that aren’t special ed are not very wheelchair accessible.

people will automatically assume you’re faking something if you’re not considered dumb enough in their standards to fit in with disabled students (aka high class ableism at its finest)

people are going to give you weird looks if you don’t suddenly start sitting with the other disabled kids

standard backpacks usually dangle way too much to keep on you easily, so try to pack light

built in storage on wheelchairs cannot sufficiently carry books

don’t try to hold an umbrella. Period. Especially not with your teeth. It doesn’t work.

don’t try to give the bus driver your ticket while you’re stuck on the ramp. And speaking of, its easy to start falling down the bus ramp so be careful, and when in doubt throw on the breaks

and finally if you’re like me pray to god you don’t go nonverbal when someone is trying to push you and you don’t want them to because it is hard to get them to stop if you can’t speak

able-bodied people can and should 1000% reblog this, some of these things I’ve seen on tips about using a wheelchair but a lot of these weren’t things I’ve seen

Reblogging because these are pretty good tips for anyone who uses a wheelchair. Also, good for people who don’t use a wheelchair to take note as well because we should never assume that just because someone is in a wheelchair, it doesn’t mean they can’t do things for themselves. That’s not to say we should ignore them if they do need help, however.

Are you insulting your chronically ill friends?

chronicallyrebellious:

Some subtly ableist but common phrases you should avoid.

“Get better soon!”
Should be, “I hope you feel better soon, or your symptoms decrease!”

“I’m normal/healthy.”
Should be, “I am able-bodied.”

“You’re differently abled/unhealthy/not normal.”
Should be, “You’re disabled.”

“You’d feel better if you tried yoga/prayer/whatever.”
Should be, “What treatments have you tried?”

“Oh my god! What happened to you?”
Should be, “How are you doing? May I ask, why you are using mobility device/brace/cast?”

“I have headaches so I completely understand your chronic migraines.”
Should be, “I cannot understand your illness, since the worst I have ever suffered is headaches. Let me know if there is anything I can do to better understand you.”

“You should get out more.”
Should be, “May I come over sometime to share a meal with you or relax?.”

“It must be so nice not to have to work/go to school.”
Should be, “It must be difficult to not be able to have an income or continue your education. Let me know if there is any way I can help you pursue your dreams.”

“It’s so tragic that [insert media character] is disabled.”
Should be, “I’m glad to see the media is portraying a character that represents 70% of the population.”

“I would just die if I had your condition!”
Should be, “I don’t understand how you cope with your condition. Can you explain to me how you’ve accepted your disability?”

“I’ve been praying that God will heal you!”
Should be, “Would you like me to pray for your healing?”

“I wish I could take my dog everywhere with me!”
Should be, “I’m glad that you have the resources to use such a multipurpose mobility aid such as a Service Dog.”

[First thing you say to the person] “I have been praying for you! God has your health in his mind!”
Should be, “How are you? Do you need any encouragement?”

“You are such an inspiration because you are disabled and coping with it!”
Should be, any other compliment not having to do with their ability to cope with a disability.

“I’m going to push your wheelchair now.”
Should be, “Do you want me to push you now?”

“But you don’t LOOK sick!”
Should be, “All disabilities are different, do you consider yours to be an invisible illness? How does it affect you?”

“Hey, at least it’s not Cancer.”
Should be, “It must be difficult to accept such a lifelong diagnosis. Is there any way I can help you?”

Add more subtly ableist phrases or alternatives! Show people how to communicate with us without it being so awkward!