D is also for… Depression

I want to talk a little bit about depression, because I don’t feel it’s talked about enough.

Depression can affect anyone at any time. It can manifest in many different ways and can be accompanied by other conditions such as anxiety. 

For me, depression and anxiety come hand-in-hand. They manifest at random times, usually as extreme overthinking. It can also cause me to be critical of others and myself, make me worry I am a burden on others and that I’m letting everyone down (even when I have no logical reason to think so), and make it really hard for me to socialise regularly. 

I recently started on anti-depressants after speaking with my therapist and my GP. So far, I’ve found my outlook on life has been better, my relationships seem to be stronger, and I feel like I’m actually worthy of spending time with. (I still struggle with prolonged social interactions but that’s another thing altogether). 
Of course, not everyone is comfortable being on medication, especially for their mental health, but that’s ok. It took me a while to feel ok about taking anti-depressants, but now I feel a lot better, and even my partner can see the difference. Obviously, I’m not saying that everyone will be ok with taking them, but I wanted to share my experience with them in case anyone was on the fence about taking them. If you choose to not take medication, that’s ok, it’s your choice, your body. You know what’s best for you more than anyone so please don’t feel pressured to start meditation if you’re not comfortable doing so. 

It’s important to talk about mental health as much as we do physical health. We need to be more open with ourselves as well as with each other in order to destigmatise mental illness.

Remember: just because you can’t see it, it doesn’t mean it’s not there. Someone may look perfectly healthy, but it’s impossible to know what’s going on underneath their smile. 
Everyone is fighting a battle you can’t see, so be kind. 

And if you are struggling right now, please reach out to your support network. There are people you can talk to who will not judge you or try to tell you what to do. They can point you in the direction of a professional, if that’s what you need, or just be an ear to listen. Please don’t suffer in silence. 


Samaritans (UK) : 116 123

Suicide Prevention (Canada): 1833-456-4566

Lifeline (Australia): 13 11 14

Suicide Prevention (USA): 1800 237 8255




Sorry for a lack of updates

I’ve been pretty busy recently; I started counselling last week to try and help with a few things I’ve been struggling with recently. My first session I didn’t think went so well because my therapist seemed a bit uncaring and disinterested because I scored low on the risk assessment. I thought I’d give it one more try before asking to change therapists and I’m glad I did; today’s session went much better because we went through some things (not everything) in depth and she seemed a lot more interested in what I had to say. She even gave some advice on something I’ve been struggling with for a while now but haven’t been able to talk about. I hope these sessions will be helpful in the long run but I guess it’s still early days.

In other news, I’m going to visit family up north this weekend which I’m hoping will help relieve some stress. It’s going to be cold but I’m prepared for that; I know the cold can make my stomach muscles hurt so I’ll be bringing a load of heat pads and my hot water bottle with me.

I hope everyone is having a safe Halloween.